My life story: Hairs in Mysterious Places

If you're a girl who wears her hair long, or if you're a dude has ever had long hair, then you know what the unpleasantness of having a long hair stuck in your butt crack is like.

I don't know exactly how they get there, but they do, and it's miserable until you can get to the bathroom and get it out.

But when you're in elementary school, you can't just go to the bathroom whenever you want. ("That's what recess is for!")

One time. when I was in third grade, I had a really terrible hair in my butt. It was made worse by the fact that I was wearing leggings, and I just couldn't wait until recess to go get it out. So when I thought that no one was looking, I reached my hand down the back of my pants and got that butt hair out.

But of course, to my horror, what do I hear from across the room?

"Megan's itching her butt!"

I felt as stupid and useless as a hair stuck in a butt crack.

And the kid's name was Ty. I remember him because he was pretty much bald himself and I was bothered by the fact that his name didn't have any proper vowels.

I'm sorry if you were offended by this post. But this is a true story, and the world needs to know that butt crack hairs are the worst, and there are millions of men and women with long hair who have to deal with this misery.

-Meg

Mundane, but Merry

I want to blog more but I don’t know what to write about, really. Our life is great, but not super exciting. We go to work, we eat food, we try to be social and not become social recluses...


We don’t have a TV yet, so we play games, read books, or clean the apartment in what little spare time we have. It’s kind of nice not to have a TV. There isn’t anything quality on hardly except the news. Which is depressing, but interesting. Movies are great, even though we don’t have a ton. I like movies there’s less chance we’ll be watching sleaze, since you can research what’s in it and there aren’t stupid commercials to worry about.


Now Sam’s in school, so he’ll have homework and studying to do. We’re still planning on getting a TV, but I’m in no rush. We’re doing our research about it, and trying to find a good deal. Because we can survive without it!


We’re busy, but it’s not as crazy as when college was going on in my life. I’m glad we have things to do, a direction to go in, and stuff to work on.



I like cleaning the apartment. I don't know how long this will last. But for now, it's still fun. 

-Meg

Hobo day

Do you remember hobo day at school? What? What do you mean your elementary school wasn't cool enough to have hobo day? (or as my mom would say, your school wasn't insensitive enough to society's ills to have a hobo day?)

My mom would not let me dress as a bum and take my lunch to school in a scarf tied around a stick, let alone dress in rags. I know, my mom was so cruel. She told me it was rude to make fun of other's misfortune.

But mom, there were schools in the south still having  race-segregated proms and you're throwing a stink about hobo day? The homeless had no idea we were dressing like them for a day during spirit week. They wouldn't care anyway, right?

It was raising awareness, after all. Until spirit week, I hadn't even thought about homeless people for probably a month! Now I was going to experience that life for myself.

All my friends were dressing up as hobos. Their parents didn't care. But I don't think I even tried that one on my mom.

So that day at school, we all sat on the floor to eat lunch. This is true. Everyone else was cool and dressed like bums. Kids were wearing fake beards and dirt and stuff. They went all out. And I was uncool because I was wearing leggings or some other trendy nineties wear, eating my lunch from the cafeteria kitchen on a styrophome tray.

Looking back, I guess it was a bit strange that my school had a hobo day. Actually, a lot of the themed days were odd. They all have to do with wearing things, usually. 




Wear school colors day -- seems innocent enough, but I there are the undertones of a fascist regime.

Wear your favorite sports team jersey -- I think this is just asking for teachers to pick favorites. I mean , I'll be honest, I'd just never look at a student the same if he came to my class wearing a BYU jersey. Better to just keep these alliances private, for the safety of everyone.

Twin day -- Way to feel isolated. What if you don't have a best friend to wear the same thing as you? Or worse, what if you do have a friend but she doesn't have any matching as you? Even if you do have a friend, it's difficult to call and plan or whatever to be twins with each other. It just takes a lot of coordination and communication skills that elementary schoolers don't have. Maybe that's what the administration as trying to foster? We may never know.

Crazy hair day -- AKA parent's nightmare. When my future kids tell me it's crazy hair day, I'm going to make them wear wigs or something. I'm not putting gallons of gel into my kids' hair to mold it around intricately shaped wire. I know from experience. My own locks have never quite recovered from the horrors of this day in high school. (And I'm pretty sure it was Paul's doing.)

Pajama day -- is everyday at Wal-mart, so there's no reason why this needs to be a day in school.

Super hero day -- it's cool if you're into super heroes, I guess. I think until I saw "The Avengers," the only super hero movie I ever made it through was "Spider Man." I just don't get them or enjoy them. But it's fun for some people, although I think the costumes might be cumbersome in a learning environment.

Injury day -- This is marginalizing injured people, but I suppose this day could serve a wise and glorious purpose. It's a great way to test if the school building is really ADA compliant when you have six kids in "wheelchairs." But then you have kids whose writing hand is "broken." And what if you have a kid who shows up claiming to have "mental trauma?" 



May  I propose some new themed spirit days?

Speak your own language day -- to encourage linguistic expression

School uniform day -- "be grateful this isn't permanent, kids."

Everything's a musical day -- it works on "Arthur" so there's no reason it shouldn't work in real life.

Pretend there was a huge earthquake day -- I know Utah had that big drill a few weeks ago, but we were terrible at pretending there was a disaster. No hiding under tables, no blood, no screaming and running from "crumbling" buildings. Come on, people. Elementary school kids could do way better than this.

Pop day -- oh wait, this was real. When I moved to my new elementary school , this was a weekly event. It was 75 cents in the teachers lounge.  Before you judge harshly, realize it was a different time back then.

-Meg

Linguistics, BA. Class of 2012

I have graduated from the University of Utah. 'Tis true. Well, I don't have my diploma yet, but they did let me dress up in academia regalia and march across the stage. I'll be getting it in the mail soon.

It was a long, hard road, although a rather short one. I swear I only just came to the U. It's been a great three years.

I would never had graduated without the help of so many people. My parents and grandparents, of course. I've also had amazing friends -- Paul was an amazing help to me my freshman year and so was my roommate Ana. Brian, Katie, Hailey, Karena, Ashley, Marsha, Sara, Jessica, Abby... just to name a few more of the friends, Chrony peeps, and roommates who helped me through. And of course, my fiance Sam, without whom I probably would not have survived my roughest semester

I had some great professors and some not-so-great ones, some interesting classes and some not-so-interesting classes. Working at the Chronicle was an amazing experience, and I'm so happy that I was able to get some amazing experience there.

It was all worth it. I love college, even though I times I thought I hated school. I look back and it was worthwhile. I love learning and I'm going to miss school. The time ahead is going to be exciting and fun. Getting married is going to be a blast, and finding a job is going to be stressful, but I am not losing hope.

-Meg

All photos are by my dear Samuel.

Three Awkward Sneezes

So, I wrote a book. It is not a novel, it's a collection of my weird creative writing.

I took a creative writing class this semester, and I'm so glad that I did. Creative writing can be as exhausting as it is fun. I'd been wanting to take one for some time, but I just never had room in my schedule. Finally, my last semester, I did.

Part of the creative writing class is making a portfolio or a chapbook. It's a collection of the stuff I wrote for this class and a few other things I decided deserved a few pages.

I printed it using the Marriott Library's Espresso Book Machine, right here on campus. It is extraordinary. You give them your PDF files and in about an hour, you have a book right in your hands, and I can print as many as I want. It was a great senior gift to myself.

-Megan

Crazier

So another year of General Conference has come and gone. I love it, even though I fall asleep almost every session.

I love being with my family, and with Sam, of course. There was the perfect mix of sun and rain, comfy and formal.

My days lately have been stressful, but very happy. Finals are approaching. My last finals, for a while, anyway. I want to go to graduate school, but I'm going to work for a while first. I don't know what I would want to go into, and Sam will be in school. I'm really ready for a break from school. I want get in the workplace and do something instead.

I'm still looking for a job, and trying not to get frustrated and discouraged. I wish I had more time to devote to job hunting. But it will come, soon enough.

Wedding plans are coming along! Bridesmaid dresses are ordered, I still get weird looks when I tell people my most prominent colors are cream, ivory, and biege. Just stay with me, people. I have some olive and sage green in there too. Not every wedding has to be hot pink and lime green.

I should also mention that I loved the Hunger Games will all my soul. Because Katniss is an awesome lady, and the story freakin' rocks. And I was with my dear Sam.

This post took me two days to write. Seriously people, I am so wonderfully busy!

-Meg

Words al dente

OK, study break.

I would like to say that I'm famous for eating my words.

I said I would go on a mission and that no boy could keep me from that. Nope.

I said I would date someone for at least a year before I got engaged. Nope.

However, I am going to graduate college before I get married, so that's one aspect I'm doing just as I said I would.

My friend NaTasha once said, "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plan for your life." I absolutely love the life I'm in right now. Is it different than I expected? You bet. I think it would be silly to pretend that's not true.

I think it's better, though, than what I had planned. It just took a little faith and a lot of love. Things are just the way they ought to be.

Yesterday, Sam and I were doing homework on his couch. I was sitting with my feet propped up on the stool. He had his back on my shoulder and his legs stretched out perpendicular to mine. We laughed about stupid things on Pinterest and watched a sad clip from a sad movie. Moments like this I would trade for nothing.

I am so happy, but I'm also filled with the usual stress and strain of school. But Sam's always there, helping me as I sprint to the finish. Having someone to lean on is a blessing.

I find myself saying cheesy things and smiling at the stupidest of things. I'm even being a little bit nicer to people. Life is so good, even if it isn't easy. I don't even care if people think I'm too young to get married.

And who knew my words would taste so delicious?

-Meg

P.S. If you want to hear Sam's side of our engagement, click right here!

I lose about everything except sleep

I am frustrated with myself.

I slept in until 1 p.m. Do you realize what this means? I have been up for 3 hours and it's almost 4 p.m. I mean, what can I do about that? My phone was on silent this morning, but if it hadn't been, I'm pretty sure I would have slept through it anyway. I'm the heaviest of sleepers.

I can't communicate without sounding like a blubbering bag of nonsense, because I'm not a morning person, even if it's in the afternoon. Sorry world, I'm on a different schedule than ya'll.

I'm in one of those moods where I don't know what to do with myself. I don't know what I want to eat, or what I want to watch. I did try to clean a little bit today, but I got tired, so I stopped mid dish scrub and spent an hour on Pinterest.

I lose everything important. I usually get it back, though. (Thank you dear couple who found my phone lying on the road and returned it to me.)

Yesterday was fun though. Sam and I went to the temple and watched Downton Abbey (a show we are so obsessed with. So magical) and we went to a gymnastics meet, had a spontaneous trip to Neilsen's Frozen Custard. Then we watched a scary movie, that now doesn't seem so scary now that's it's day time.

I just need to remember how happy and optimistic I was last night so I can stop being a grump today.

The end.

-Meg

p.s. Does anyone know any way I can help myself wake up at a decent time? I want to sleep in, because it's the weekend, but this 1 p.m. stuff is ridiculous. 

Simply having a wonderful Christmas time

You know, Christmas. That time of year that is busy but beautiful, cold but cozy, expensive but exciting. In the past two weeks, I have made two kinds of cupcakes.

Vanilla on vanilla,

...and Gingerbread. (Recipe found here)

Except I used my favorite cream cheese frosting recipee. (We've been spelling it like that at our house recently. Don't ask)

Sam and I learned a duet on the piano, and it was so much fun. I loved playing and practicing with him. We make a good team. And it was one of my favorite songs, "Angels We Have Heard on High," except I always sing the words to "Angels from their Realms of Glory," except I only know the first line of that. But it's just so cool!

Anyway, I was secondo as usual. I like it because the player on the bottom pedals, and I like using the pedal because it makes me feel powerful. The hard part about the bottom is it's all in F clef, which I'm far less skilled at reading. But it is good practice for me.

I received many wonderful things, like a crockpot, luggage, clothes, and a watch. Sam gave me some wonderful pictures, and he got a large framed print of our favorite one.

But I do love giving people presents, like zebra print sheets for my sister Lindsey who's obsessed with all things zebra. And I gave Adriana a gift certificate to Color Me Mine, so she can go make some cool pottery.

In other news, I have been running and working out because a) I have time, b) I'm going to get fat from all the goodies and treats that the holidays bring, and c) I have new running clothes and watch.

Well, time to bring on the new year. And the new semester. Yay!

Making it up as I go

I am really big into life evaluation. I worry that sometimes I spend more of my life analyzing my time than actually living my life. Anyway, the point is that finals are coming around the corner. That means another crossword puzzle to construct, a few papers and lots of studying to do.

Because I was home for Thanksgiving break, and when I came back I was busy doing stuff with my cousins and Sam, I neglected to go grocery shopping. I will be fine... I have food, but I don't have fresh food, like eggs or milk or bread. [sigh].

So I tried to make muffins, right, like I do every weekend. And I was all, "I can just make up my own recipe... la la la..."

I mean, I did it once before, right?

Um, they are gross. Embarrassing thing is that I gave them to my home teachers before I even tried them myself. And they were nice and they lied and said they were good! When Sam and I ate them, we just could not eat another bite. So now I feel really dumb. And I think I need to stick to recipes that people have actually tested. Maybe I'll try to fix it, but for now, just know that today's Muffin Monday is gross so I am not even going to post the recipe.

And yes, I am aware that I forgot to post about muffins last week. Forgive me. Here it is! This recipe is delicious, and there is more sugar than flour.  They are technically financiers, which is a French Muffin. Oui Oui!

And Sam got to separate the egg whites from the egg yokes. He was very excited about that.

So finals are just around the river bend... and as close as I am to finishing it... I'm giving up NaNoWriMo. I'm 37 thousand words in, and I could still finish...But no. Let's face it, I'd rather be spending time with Sam or doing my homework. Because I'm shamelessly in love and school is important (even though I am seriously lacking motivation).

And I know that writing it here makes it official. And I hate to say that this is the second year in a row that I have come short of 50,000 words. I have done much more than I did last year--I think I got to 17k?--and I have a legitimate story.  I started with nothing and now I have this little plot and a million characters and I love them, and they are their own people.

Ya, lots of psycho madness goin' on right now. Thought I'd just rattle on to the world about muffins and writing and love.

I am going to write more soon. I promise. More scenes from the weekend:

-Meg

Writing, and other strange acts

I actually wrote this a few days ago, but forgot to publish it. So here goes.

As I am writing my novel, and fighting valiantly through the happiness and stress of my life, I have a list of things that I must always remember. I am amazed at how similar those two things are. Perhaps it is a good sign that my novel's character is so similar to me, because she helps me not forget those things which I must not forget. They seem cryptic only because they apply across the spectrum of my existence.

1. I am not the victim.
2. The answer will come.
3. I am fearless.

Today I'm feeling ill, so I'm staying home from class. Although this really isn't making me feel better, because now I'm just stressed about everything I'm missing. I'm trying to use this time to get caught up in all my assignments, but ugh... one day I will done with school!

-Meg

p.s. NaNoWriMo updated. I'm at about 11k words. I would never be able to do it without Sam or Katie. It's far from over but I don't know how I would have even survived this long without their support. I just thought I'd mention that because they are just super cool. 

p.p.s. I came home and a Weeping Angel was in my room, on my compy. Ya, I was terrified, in a happy way.

And let me tell you...

When it's so early in the morning, blogger is a strange comfort. I know I will be greeted with blogs filled classy outfit posts, cheerful words and nerdy indulgences. I empty all my thoughts into this pensive.

Today I was full of Spanish. It filled me up and I was brimming with all the vowels and soft syllables, the trilled r's and the galloping rhythm of the sentences. I had things to say in class and I said them fearlessly. I felt so wonderful.

Not all Spanish days are like this. Many days I don't understand anything and I can't articulate. I hate not being able to say what I mean.

This weekend is so welcome. Another week at the Chronicle has ended, and we had far fewer difficulties than we had a week ago, when the server had the flu and we had to do some voodoo with wires to make everything come out all right. All good and faithful techies of the world deserve a hug, but ours earned a gold medal of awesomeness.

Today's picture is a darling comic from the archives of the Chronicle--circa 1982. Enjoy.

-Meg

Sunflowers

It's a midweek lull and the only response I can give to anyone about anything is "I'm tired."

But I have fresh berries and carrots in my fridge and Katie put sunflowers on our mantle. I am sure I will go to the farmers market again soon.

I have been working on my teaching philosophy and it is more interesting to me than I could have imagined, although I still don't think I have a full grasp of the meaning of teaching.

In fact, I can't tell if I'm grasping anything these days, but I think as I start to get more sleep, things will clear up inside my head.

-Meg

Blueberry Bandana Muffins

I got to use my new kitchen on Sunday to make these muffins. The recipe is from my grandma/mom. It is originally a bread recipe, but can be easily adapted to muffin form.

Make sure the bananas are mashed up and mixed into the batter as much as you can. I wished I had done that because I had huge gooey globs of banana in the muffins. It didn't taste bad, but it made it so the muffins don't travel well. It also would have helped if I used liners, since the blueberrries were kind of messy too.

This wasn't my favorite recipe ever, but it was easy. It just tasted too much like bread and not enough like muffins. And my mind--and tongue--expects them to be just plain blueberry muffins and they are not! There is banana in there which overpowers everything.

If you like banana bread, then this is a good recipe for you.

1/2 cup butter, softened

1 cup sugar

2 eggs

1 tsp vanilla

2 cups all-purpose flour

1 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp salt

2 large (very) ripe bananas, mashed

1 1/2 cup blueberries

1/2 cup chopped nuts (optional)

Cream butter and sugar. Mix eggs and vanilla. Add dry ingredients and mix well. Stir in bananas and blueberries.

Bake in a 350 degree oven for about 30 minutes.

------------------

OK, now that I've done something completely out of my element and talked about FOOD, I'll tell you about the first day of class!

I rode my bicycle to the institute. My first class is "The Gospel and World Religions." I'm really excited because I love the instructor and it sounds really interesting.

Then I had Spanish, and I'm surprised how much I retained over the summer. Yay!

Next was my methodology class. To demonstrate what we'd learn to do by the end of the semester, the professor taught us some Italian... in Italian. It was way cool.

I finished the hot day in my non-air conditioned acting class. There are a lot of freshmen, but the professor seems really nice. I love her positive attitude.

Well, that's my first day of my last year of undergrad. Yay!

-MEG

My crib!

I finally found my camera, and my new room is almost clean and perfect.

I made more pillows than I expected, but it was (for the most part) easy and fun to make them, so I made way more than I know what to do with!

The sprocket pillow was made from this tutorial.

Key to my awesome wall collage:

A: poster from "Little Women." In high school we put this on and I was Meg.

B: A flower frame I got from Swiss days, long long ago.

C. A little painting from Fiji. My great-great uncle was a mission president there in the early 80's.

D: A Monet painting. Monet is my favorite.

E: Peter Pan. Is magical.

F: My family!

G: A picture I took of my dad and my sister Adriana at the cabin.

H: A poster from the band fun. They rock.

My awesomespice cousin Kristen helped me assemble and hang them all. (She's so good at using Command strips.)

Muffin Monday coming up tomorrow!

Oh ya, and school starts tomorrow. I probably should go, huh?

-M

Graduation

My sister was the first one to graduate from her high school. Literally. Our last name starts with M, but she's in the choir, and at the end because she is short. So she was the very first one to walk.

I also should brag and say that Lindsey received the "Titan for Life" award for her contributions to the school. She did work dang hard!

She has two cousins that are almost exactly her same age. They were all born in about three weeks of each other. Austin and Tarah graduated recently, too.

That means five of the grandkids have graduated. Some are really anxious to get done though.

You have a long way to go, buddy. Tackle kindergarten first.

(Speaking of kindergarten... every single graduation speech felt mentioned something about kindergarten, and how much has changed since then. Sooo unoriginal. Graduation speeches are usually pretty dull. One I like is J. K. Rowling's address she gave at Hogwarts Harvard a few years ago. Read it here.)

-Megan

Shoes and school

I just need to talk about these shoes for a bit.

Reasons why these are miraculous--

1) I bought them online and yet they fit, were the right color and height.

2) They cost $30. The brand is MIA, and I didn't realize how expensive that brand could be until I was looking at other shoes from MIA. I got soooo lucky on the price.

3) They go with any outfit and I can dance in them.

4) My sisters love them and wear them too. (We share clothes, but sometimes they don't like my taste.)

I just wanted to express my gratitude for my gray shoes. I adore them.

I also feel the need to say that I'm so excited to graduate! Next spring is the plan. Feast your eyes on my DARS report:

The dark green is what I've done. The light green is what I'm registered for in the fall, and the pink is what I still have left to do.

I also found my camera battery charger, finally. Now I can post pictures that are of respectable quality.

Over and out.

-Meg

P.S. Sorry I wrote about school. I know I promised I wouldn't. Sorry. I'll stop now.

Bye Bye!

Turning in this guy tomorrow. Phew! (Or however one spells that sound of relief.)

I rent most of my text books, which I love. Sometimes I get a little jealous, and want to keep the books for myself, but then I remember that I really do not need them, and I will never use them again. It is someone else's turn to be internally shredded by minimalism syntax.

One more final, you guys! Then I promise I won't blog about my boring college for THREE WHOLE MONTHS! You have my word. I am going to talk about delightful things. So look forward to that.

-ME

Mood

Finals always makes me want to pick a different major.

Like Parks, Recreation and Tourism. Or Yoga. Or Tetris. Or breathing.

I've never changed my major. I suppose I could, but I do like linguistics. Sometimes though, I just hate doing syntax. I'm allowed to do feel that way, right?

But if there was such thing as a tetris major, I would seriously do that as my major. Just sayin'.

I guess what gets me down during finals is knowing that I am bring about my own stress, my own pain, and my own trials. It doesn't have to be this way. I don't have to procrastinate. I don't have to waste time. I don't have to get discouraged, yet I do. I let myself give in to my weakness as I freak out and panic.

On the instructions for my syntax take-home test, my professor wrote: Don't panic. Don't Delay. I am not trying to trick you.

Comforting, but still so hard. So. hard.

I can do this.

In 48 hours it will be summer and I will be freee! (Yes, with 3 e's) I'm going to celebrate by going to the park and listening to my ipod while I swing. It is seriously my favorite thing to do.

-M

Two days until take off...!

Above: Sneak peak at super cool origami projecto!

OK you guys! This is it!

I just have to go to school today.

Get waxed.

Go to Lehi.

Sleep.

Wake up, get ready, get the bride ready.

Go to the temple.

Go to the reception later that night.

Fly away to my cruise.

-----------------------------------------------

I'm so close! I should be in class right now, but considering I have about 3 hours of sleep, I figured it would be pretty futile. I'm going to try to get stuff done... You guys... I'm so crazy....

You don't even know...

I probably won't blog until after my cruise, so peace out and expect a heck of a report! And LOADS of pictures! I love you all with all my heart and soul!

-MEG

p.s. I'll miss you!