Sunday, January 31, 2010

Kindness Begins with Me

Judging is bad, I know
But there are situations when you have to judge character.
Like choosing an eternal companion.
Or even picking your friends.

New future husband qualification trait:
-He’s nice to complete strangers.

It takes a person with character to be polite and respectful to a stranger. Yelling and swearing is for when your friend is getting pick-pocketed. Anything else is not okay. I judge a person to be of good character when he or she is kind to when there’s no ulterior motive, like getting a “A”, or a job, or making a friend connection. I like people who are good for the sake of being good.

My new resolve is to be kind to everyone. No matter what.

-just little old me(g)

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Conversations and Neanderthals

George: "Sorry, is it Meg or Megan?"

Me: "Well, my name is Megan, but I go by Meg."

George: "Oh, so it's your street name?"

Me: "Ya, I guess you could say that."

Right now I'm fascinated/obsessed by neanderthals, fairies, Ingrid Michealson, and mermaids.

The End


Tuesday, January 19, 2010


I've begun my last year as a teenager. Wow! I can hardly fathom that I've made it this far. Heck, I remember when I went to kindergarden and I thought I was SO grown-up.

The highlights of my teenage years (I stole this idea from Laura btw- check out her blog here.)

13- I was in 7th grade, trying to figure out the big scary new Jr. High. It really was new- it was West Point Jr. High's maiden voyage. I got contacts. I was in Brigadoon (with the above-mentioned Laura).

14-8th grade. Didn't do the musical, but I did mock trial! I didn't do much this year- not sure why.

15-9th grade. Had my first crush, and first lead in the musical (those stories are very connected). I did NAL, and found my inner nerdom. Pretty much a crazy busy year, but very worth it. I dyed my hair for the first time.

16- Sophomore. I got lost in Cleafield High. I did the musical ( I was a wine glass and a bar maid). Had more crushes, met more people, and started driving. Dates slowly started happening, and I had fun, even though I got super nervous. I started hanging out with guys instead of girls. I thought I wanted to go into medicine.

17-Junior. Slowly got over the nerves for dating. I helped start a new school, Syracuse High. I was the editor of the yearbook, even though I had no experience. I did choir and the musical, and more AP classes. Took an online Spanish Course (?). I realized that the best thing I could do with my life is write and edit. I learned how to kiss.

18-Senior. This year was fun. I got to know all the teachers, got away with tons of stuff, ruled SHS as the first graduating class. We didn't have seniors the year before, so it was exciting to be the top dogs. Twice. Kept singing in madrigals. Did an internship with the Standard Examiner and still did yearbook. Really got obsessed with grammar. Concluded I was born to do something with the language arts. Ended a relationship with a guy I'd dated for a while. He was cool, but it was over.

19- Freshman. At the bottom of the totem pole at the University of Utah studying Linguistics instead of English as planned. Dated a really cute guy for a while, got dumped, and survived relatively happy. Met people from all over the world.

I can't wait to see what else is in store for me.


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Semester 2, sans Choir

Two days of my second semester of college: complete. They were pretty painless and easy going, I’m really grateful.

But something is missing—and it’s a big deal. I’m not in choir.

This is not my choice; in fact, I would do anything to have it. Well, I guess not anything. My major just conflicts with music. Music isn’t my top priority, but it’s up there. It keeps me alive.
My Linguistics 3510 class conflicts with not only Women’s Chorus, but with A Capella as well, which is the choir a level higher, but still something I could handle. I can’t do either one. I can’t do Institute Singers either, because they meet at the same time.

I can’t even be in my Ward Choir, because that meets the same time as mission preparation, and as part of my calling I have to go.

Ever since about 5th grade, I’ve been in some type of choir. There was a break in 7th grade, but I was taking voice lessons at that point so I was still singing.

I love writing, but the process of it is quite solitary. It is the path I have chosen, but there is no choir of writers to shelter me or welcome me into their loving arms. There is no bond, no family of people united in a common love. There is no one to make me lift me and assure me I am needed. Writers don’t do that. We wander alone with our notepads, trying to make life an understandable fantasy. We explain things, we make up stories, and we imagine things and record them. It is a beautiful art because it is one of communication. But we are not together. We need one another only so one can read another’s work.

I will miss choir, but I intend to do it again. I’ll be surviving without singing, or playing piano.

Side note: I promise I’ll stop complaining, but this is weird. I have two classes that seem almost identical in my head and it makes me confused! Linguistics 3510 and Writing 2010. We even use the same textbook! This makes me even more enraged because I don’t need the linguistics class if my writing class is teaching me the same things…
Anyway, I love school and I love college. I was really meant to be here, and I realize that even more now that I’m here.

With love,


PS- Like the new backdrop of the blog? I hope so!

PPS- I watched "Doubt" recently. Amazing show, the intensity and power makes me shiver with delight. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

On Love

Why do people make a distinction between their “love life” and just “life?”

Falling in love is such a wonderful process. I am not sure I’ve felt it completely, but after a few bitter tastes in my mouth I know what it is not. I have difficulty describing it except in poetry, and even then I don’t think I’m doing it justice. I am puzzled and fascinated by love. Feeling it changes me. The most marvelous quality of love is that it is not a solitary act. Two people must be involved. Right now I’m in the midst of defining love and being in love and dealing with love. I’ve been doing this for a while and I think I’ll be lost wandering around the concept for a long time to come. I don’t think I want to be done anytime soon.

Love at first sight? How absurd. Why would anyone want to fall in love in an instance? Falling is better than simply “being.” I’m falling in love right now, and I expect I’ll be in an eternal romantic freefall my entire existence! I would not want to compress all of that into a split second. I would not want to experience it with only one of my senses! I want every fiber of my being involved in the transformation. I want to be aware of every step, of every change. I want to relish and savor every moment.

Perhaps some people want to find a soul mate, and they want a confirmation of sorts. That’s why love at first sight seems so appealing. However, the concept of soul mates is a curious one. There are 6 billion people in this world. Of that, about 3 billion are the gender I prefer. Probably half are ineligible due to age and marital status. Oh wait, I want to marry a Mormon. There are 13.5 Mormons. Half that—about 7 million. And I forgot--he needs to be a returned missionary. There are about fifteen thousand full time missionaries world-wide and 80% are male. So out of twelve thousand young men, only one is destined to be with me? The odds are better than 1.5 billion, but still. How could I date all those young men and find the right one? There isn’t just one person for me. There are certainly boys that I like better than others and that are better for me. But I firmly believe that with hard work and love, any relationship will work.

That’s part of the joy, really. I have a choice about falling in love. I can choose that person. What an exciting decision that is, too. I don’t want it determined for me by some other power, (although much of love should be accredited to divine intervention.) I get to figure it out. I get to feel rejection, I get to have some lonely nights, and I get to be successful once and a while.
Sometimes there is confusion and doubt. There will be times of longing and hardship, but I am sure that real, pure love is a constant source of comfort during the hard times. Doesn’t love hold our world together?

Let’s have a little faith in love. With patience, it all will come. Everything will work out. Love will find you as long as you’re not hiding from it.

From an ever hopeful,

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Why I don’t believe in New Year’s Resolutions

We have begun our journey on the final year of the decade. (By they way, I hold that the new decade starts in 2011, not 2010.) Anyway, everyone seems excited, and they should be! Now we get to write a new date our checks and on the top of our journal entries.

But then again, don’t we write a new date every day? No day is ever the same. Even though we are in a new year, not much has changed. Over time, yes, things will happen and our culture will transform. It just isn’t an overnight change. The economy isn’t suddenly better, we have the same president, and we’re still doing exactly what we were doing three days ago.

That’s why resolutions seem pointless to me. I’m all for reform and changing for the better, but since when have New Year resolves worked? By mid-February, all zeal for change has faded.
When I want to make myself better, I’m just start working on it right away. Resolves can be born any time of the year, because every day is a new day. Every day is a new date.

Perhaps one reason the New Year’s doesn’t faze me is because it is not the time when major changes in my life happen. Every September is like January 1st for me. That’s when I go back to school and my life does drastically change. Especially this last year—I moved down to Salt Lake to go to college. That was a true new chapter in my life.

Just some thoughts.

Happy New Year and good luck keeping whatever resolves you have. I hope you had an amazing holiday season!