It's Getting Awkward in Here

It's no secret that I'm an awkward person.


One of my fingers always has a nail that's awkwardly longer than the rest. I go days without showering and openly admit it to people, forgetting that for some, anything short of daily showering is considered offensive. Sometimes I find myself talking at people instead of with people. When I'm skyping, it's really hard not to look at the little screen that shows what I look like. I'm so vain. I'm far too obsessed with my Klout score. I crack my knuckles all the time. I crack my toes and my fingers... bad habit that probably grosses people out. I know. I'm sorry. I'm awkward. I play Pocket Frogs and other really stupid, not-even-nerd-worthy games on my iPod. Sometimes I wish I was a gamer. I also think about grammar a lot. Relative pronouns are haunting me right now. ("Somebody That I Used to Know" or "Somebody Who I Used to Know"?)


I just wanted to get those awkward things out there. I hope that wasn't awkward for you.

Not that this means anything to you, but please notice how I have about seven White Bruna Obaro frogs at once. It was really frustrating. It's not even a for a set. Lindsey is probably the only person who appreciates this. (Or is it -- the only person that appreciates this?)

I need to go to bed. This is getting awkward.

-Meg

The Story

I always thought I would cry, when the time came.

But instead I just laughed--a giddy, unbridled happy laugh. I think I said, "oh my gosh" and I might have said, "I think I'm the happiest person in the world right now."

I don't really remember.

I should have seen it coming, really. But you see, Sam's always romantic and thoughtful. It's not unusual at all for him to show up with flowers and to remember that six months ago we met for the first time. We usually go on fun, well planned-out dates. He's always so sweet. And he didn't seem nervous at all!

We snowshoed up to Donut Falls. It's a significant place in our courtship, so it was a fitting place to end it and begin our engagement.

He asked me to marry him! We were taking pictures like we always do--I go stand in the frame while he sets up his camera on the tripod.

One moment I was squinting into the snow, the next I look up and there he is, the love of my life down on one knee. And he's holding a ring in a little gray box.

It's perfect. I've never worn a ring in my whole life. (OK, maybe I wore a CTR ring for a few days when I was 8.) I'm just not a jewelry person. But this is so different. It signifies so much, and it's so beautiful, and it's exactly my style.

Sam and I have been calling and texting and visiting so much this weekend. We have to let everyone know our exciting news. Getting back to life and focusing on essential things will be difficult, but somehow between now and July 12, we're going to be planning our new life together.

I'm going to New Orleans for the ACES conference in April, graduate in May, and get a job... all while planning a wedding.

I am so blessed! Sam is so wonderful. He is the perfect man for me. I'm so happy and in love, I think I'm going to explode. It's been hard not to blog as much, mostly because before now, I couldn't share all these exciting plans with the world. But now, I will have so much to write about. This is the start of a beautiful journey.

I have such a wonderful family, and my new Thornton family is so kind and loving. Our friends have been fantastic and supportive. There is so much love going on!

Oh, and lest I forget! Happy Grammar Day!

-Meg

21

Today, I would appreciate it if you would do something for me. Donate to your favorite charity, do your homework, smile at strangers, go the extra mile, protect free speech, floss, visit a nursing home, don't swear, wash your hands, refill someone's meter, write a thank you note, take a bubble bath, give up your seat on the bus, eat some chocolate, stay calm in traffic, use good grammar, adopt a puppy or a kitty from the shelter, listen to some country music, write a poem, draw a picture, quote a Disney movie, pick up a copy of The Daily Utah Chronicle, read your scriptures, do some yoga, dance in the kitchen, make your bed, call an old friend, tell a joke, listen thoughtfully, or visit your local library.

Because did I mention it's my birthday?

-Meg

I challenge you do do any of those things, (or any other wonderful acts you can dream of) and tell me about them!

(You might have noticed that I haven't done any Muffin Monday posts since the year started. That is because I am disbanding them. I will continue to make muffins every weekend, but I won't post about them unless they are super super good. I just have so much going on right now, I have to prioritize.)

Observations on The Bachelor

I watched The Bachelor. Let me justify this act: So the break got the best of me. Boredom set in, and I was caught up on all the New Girl episodes. 

My observations:

First of all, the entire concept is a bit strange. Think about it--let's get a bunch of twenty-somethings who all claim they are ready to find "the one" and throw them in a house together. Let them wear more makeup than clothing. Put one attractive single guy in charge of narrowing them down, eliminating them one by one until he finds the woman he wants to marry.

If you didn't watch the first episode of that season, it's OK. The rest of the post will still make sense. It may, however, make you throw up in your mouth. Don't say I didn't warn you.

My first impression was that everything was so fake. That's a crazy way to describe reality TV, I know. This makes me doubt everything! So if love isn't like the scripted movies... is it really that awkward and shallow as reality TV and nobody notices?

All the girls (contestants?) seems so nice in their intro videos. Each one makes me say, "aww, she's so cute and unique!" They talk about their life, and then there's a wide shot of her walking the streets of her home town, in a breezy blouse and short shorts, taking in the sights and sounds of her surroundings...

But then I see them on the show and I'm so disgusted. There's so much cady drama and competition. Like really? It's a bit over my head. I know I would hate to have all that competition. You have to be loud and if you don't stand out, the bachelor won't give you a rose. (That means she gets to stay in the house longer.)

All this begs the question: What if he don't like forward, brash women? Is that a qualification to be the bachelor? 

If I wasn't in an amazing relationship filled with mutual understanding and respect, I'd find myself getting extremely self-conscious about my flirting (not to mention my own pensive strolls). Because every girl acts so weird when she flirts. Do I look so awkward? Do I endlessly comment and stroke guys' hair and recite meaningless rehearsed pick up lines? Do I throw my head back and laugh just because I want him to think I'm a funny gal?

I'd like to think no, especially since I'm not competing with anyone for Sam's affection. (And I can say that with some certainty.)

There's a lot of squealing and "sexy!"

There's a lot of crying.

There's a lot of walking. You know, the kind of strolling that humans do all the time--hands in pockets, deep thoughts about love and life bouncing around in your head, all the while looking gorgeous, completely oblivious to the camera following your every step.

One good thing:

There is a girl named Elyse, and that's my middle name. That's cool.

Back to weird things:

How long did it take them to think of their first entrance? One at a time, each girl walks out of the limo and greet the bachelor. (I think his name is Ben. You'd think I'd remember after 1 and a half hours. But I was just trying to get the girls' names down.)

Some are kind of cool, but most have these weird quirky pick up lines that try to both to attract him and make him remember something unique. For instance, the law student girl was all, "the verdict is in... you're guilty... of being hot!"

(All they talk about is how hot he is. To fair, that's all they had to go on the first day. And that's really all he said about them. Because that's all that matters.)

Another girl just walked right by... being cool. She didn't talk to him. Not a word. Guess what? She didn't get a rose. Sorry hun, you might have to study up on the grammar of body language. And before you tell me she's a just shy girl, I'd like to refute that shy girls don't give guys looks like that.

Most of the girls blended together to me, despite their clever first lines and crazy attire. I can't tell them apart because most of them look the same. Usually I do remember if they're a blonde or a brunette though. To viewers of previous seasons: Has a redhead ever been on?  Now I'm curious. I also wonder why they are all white. No Asians or Hispanics or Blacks? 

One last thing:

The model is the ugliest girl there. And she kind of looks like Ursula when she comes up onto dry land.

Photo

She kind of acts like it, too.

Oh, and before I forget, one more good thing:

A girl showed up on a horse! She was cool, too. She seemed natural, and real real, not just reality real. So far, anyway...

I don't know if I want to watch the rest of the season. But I am curious how this grandma lady fits in. (Ya, there was a grandma. I'm kind of confused.) 

Starting on Monday, I'll have school to keep me busy, so I won't have to resort to watching reality TV. Say yay!

-Meg

Just for kicks and giggles or Sólo por diversión y risas

Okay, scratch that last post. I thought of something good to say now! I don't delete things, so that wretched post will remain, but now I have a few specklings of brilliance to throw out onto the canvas of the world wide web.

I love language. I love it, even when I don't understand it. So I have this new friend, Marsha, who is in the Linguistics program with me, and Spanish is her L1, but she speaks English wonderfully too. Today I started a new institute class, and she is in it with me! I'm so thrilled! Anyway, she said the closing prayer, and she asked the teacher if she could give it in Spanish. Of course he said yes.

It was so beautiful! I just love listening to the sounds, even though I really don't understand it. I focused on the spirit of the prayer, not the words.

And of course, there was a Spanish-speaking returned missionary rushing up to her after class trying to show off his knowledge of Spanish to impress her. I giggled at that.

Anyway, I'm going to switch my facebook to Spanish because I just love Spanish, and I can't WAIT to take it in the fall! I've taken a little bit before, but I want to really embrace it now. Yay! I can't wait to be non monolingual! Wait... that would be bilingual! (Duh)

Just for kicks and giggles... here is the post in Espanol, thanks to Google Translate (my bff).

Bueno, a los arañazos que la última entrada. Pensé en algo bueno que decir ahora! Yo no lo borrado, por lo que después seguirá siendo miserable, pero ahora tengo un specklings algunos de brillo a tirar en el lienzo de la World Wide Web.


Me encanta el idioma. Me encanta, aunque yo no lo entiendo. Así que tengo este nuevo amigo, Marsha, que está en el programa de Lingüística conmigo, y el español es su L1, pero ella habla Inglés maravillosamente también. Hoy he comenzado un nuevo instituto de clase, y es en ella conmigo! Estoy tan emocionada! De todos modos, dijo que la oración final, y le preguntó al profesor si podía darle en español. Por supuesto, él dijo que sí.

Era tan hermoso! Me encanta escuchar los sonidos, aunque realmente no lo entiendo. Me concentré en el espíritu de la oración, no las palabras.

Y, por supuesto, estaba tratando de una de habla española volvió corriendo misionero hasta su clase después de hacer alarde de su conocimiento del español para impresionarla. Me reí en eso.

De todos modos, voy a cambiar mi facebook a español porque me encanta el español, y no puedo esperar para tomar en el otoño! Me he tomado un poco antes, pero quiero realmente abrazar ahora. Yay! No puedo esperar a ser monolingües no! Espera ... que ser bilingüe! (Duh)

-Megan

Exclamation Points, Eating, and a short list of utterances

Yay! Another really late post! Hold on to your hats! Let's hope that this is semi-good (let's face it, the last couple of posts have been LAME!)

Now that I've overused my exclamation points, we can move along to the rest of my rant.

I'm so so tired. (Duh). It is so hot. I can't believe I complained about the cold just a few weeks ago! (Crap, I just used another exclamation point.) I am blaming the heat for the reason why I cannot sleep. The heat is keeping me up, that and my homework, which isn't due until Monday, but I have a feeling I will have absolutely no desire to do it tomorrow, because tomorrow is Mr. Hill's farewell. The fact that tomorrow is his farewell and that in a just 3 days he will be embarking on a long journey to an island 6,000 miles away is NOT why I'm still awake. Because I wouldn't whine about that on my blog. How cliche would that be?

Another reason I'm still awake and it's almost 1 a.m.: I think I've had like MAYBE 700 calories today. And like half of those were from a serving of Alfredo noodles. Alfredo is my weakness! I know it is one of THE most unhealthy dishes one could eat, but I always get it! (Well, actually my mommy made it for dinner, so I didn't have a choice.) But I actually didn't feel as guilty as I normally would. I had a toaster strudel this morning and a slice of left over frozen pizza for lunch. So I was so happy when I drove all the way home from work and mom had saved me food from dinner! But even with a normal dinner, I'm still out of whack from not eating. I love eating, I just don't ever have time to eat.

Wow, that was an pathetically long paragraph about food. I'm sorry, I know it is so impolite and boring to write about food! And I'm feeling nauseated anyway, so writing about vittles was an extremely poor decision... oh well! (And there I go again with the exclamation points!)

Maybe I should only write blog posts in the wee hours of the morning. The floodgates of my creativity are so weakened by sleep deprivation that they break open all the thoughts I would keep to myself while in a rational state.

I am really going to go to sleep soon, but I have to say one more utterance! (Okay, maybe more like 3 or 4.)

1. I saw TOY STORY 3. I loved it (I mean, is there any other way to feel about that movie?) I could really hype up this show, but it really stands alone. Just see it, and if you cry, that's okay, because I cried too.

2. I love my daddy. Happy father's day dad! I suppose I should make a Dad blog post just like I did for mother's day. Well... I will ... I guess. But I just get the feeling my pops aren't as sentimental about that kind of thing. I'll still do it though.

3. There are a total of 12 exclamation points in this post alone! Not okay! (13) Using exclamation points is like laughing at your own jokes. (Name that movie!) (14). Sometimes they are necessary, I think, especially in texting and such, because how else can you convey an excited and engaged tone? This is an endless puzzlement for me.

4. Speaking of puzzles... well, I'm not going to say anything about that. Mr. Hill does not read this blog, but YOU NEVER KNOW!

5. Speaking of Mr. Hill, after tomorrow he shall be called ELDER HILL. Although I've decided that when I get letters from him, they shall be called "Epistle of Paul." Because that's just cool.

14 exclamation points later and WAY TOO MANY CAPITALIZED WORDS, I end this tremendous blog post, which exhibits the extreme insanity of me. If you have read until the end, I commend you (as I often do). You are a brave soul.

-just little old me(g)

The Passive Voice (My final research paper)

This is my new approach to revising my essay. As you can see, I had a lot of reorganizing to do.

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Linguists have very bad handwriting, leaving me no choice but to decipher my professor's comments, which were all in Chickenscratchese. All 3 of my linguistic professors so far have had atrocious handwriting. Let it be known that I have excellent hand writing.

-Meg

The Social Sciences are Stalking Me

What is it with me and the social sciences?

I’m studying linguistics, which is pretty much the analytical side of language. I do grammar and syntax and academic/technical writing.

I never intended to study social sciences. Ever. And I’ve had plans to go into everything at some point in time.

Yet somehow I was Social Sciences Sterling Scholar for my high school, which I thought meant history. Now I’m really realizing that’s only half the discipline.

In college I took a Social Sciences LEAP class (pretty much freshman transition) only because it fit into my schedule and I LOVE the books we read. They’re controversial—like Steven J. Gould’s The Mismeasure of Man – a book which appears everywhere in anything remotely related to the social sciences.

Now this semester I’m taking an anthropology class. And we’re talking about race, evolution, genes, natural selection, intelligence… and that’s what I learned about in LEAP as well.

I like this sort of stuff, but I never wanted to pursue it. Instead it’s pursuing me! Now I’m writing a series of poems about it all because it’s very poetigenic*.

And in my nerdness, I’m spending my entire spring break writing a long paper about human evolution.

-Meg

*Attractive as a subject for poetry.

Grammar Day

Happy Grammar Day!

I love grammar. It used to be because I'm the sort of person who likes black and white, right and wrong. There are rules in grammar, and they make sense, at least to me. (I know, you think that they don't make sense, but trust me, they do. You just have to dig deep enough.)

I never learned grammar in school, so I think that's why I took an interest in it. I never got to diagram sentences or make trees. So grammar was some mysterious secret. A secret that makes most people nervous, true, but it was just intriguing to me.

So I took a few grammar classes my first semester of college. Wow! My eyes were opened. There are many kinds of grammar, I learned. I'd always assumed that prescriptive grammar is the only kind. When you think grammar, you're most likely thinking of prescriptive grammar. It is exactly what the name implies-- those are the grammar rules that "prescriptivists" prescribe to people. Some rules make sense, others are just stupid. (Like that splitting infinitives are wrong.)

There is also descriptive grammar. That's what linguistics use to simply describe what happens when we speak and write. They don't judge what is "right" or "wrong" They do not try to change people's habits, they simply document them.

Mental grammar is what we have in our heads. We are born with the ability to communicate in our brain, which is amazing. We're not pre-wired to play piano, or golf, or sew. But God gave us the ability to understand a language and pick it up within just the first few years of life. Our brains are a super-computers! That we can speak not one, but three or four languages is a miracle. That is a feat! I'm realizing that language is not an accident the more I study linguistics. You're reading this so your brain is taking the shapes on the screen and interpreting them into ideas and words. That is no easy feat. We are still struggling to make computers understand language the way the human brain does.

Language is a miracle. So even if you don't know the difference between "you're" and "your," be grateful that you can read, write, and speak, because it is amazing that you can!

-Meg

P.S. If you want to know more about National Grammar Day, click here.

19!

I've begun my last year as a teenager. Wow! I can hardly fathom that I've made it this far. Heck, I remember when I went to kindergarden and I thought I was SO grown-up.

The highlights of my teenage years (I stole this idea from Laura btw- check out her blog here.)

13- I was in 7th grade, trying to figure out the big scary new Jr. High. It really was new- it was West Point Jr. High's maiden voyage. I got contacts. I was in Brigadoon (with the above-mentioned Laura).

14-8th grade. Didn't do the musical, but I did mock trial! I didn't do much this year- not sure why.

15-9th grade. Had my first crush, and first lead in the musical (those stories are very connected). I did NAL, and found my inner nerdom. Pretty much a crazy busy year, but very worth it. I dyed my hair for the first time.

16- Sophomore. I got lost in Cleafield High. I did the musical ( I was a wine glass and a bar maid). Had more crushes, met more people, and started driving. Dates slowly started happening, and I had fun, even though I got super nervous. I started hanging out with guys instead of girls. I thought I wanted to go into medicine.

17-Junior. Slowly got over the nerves for dating. I helped start a new school, Syracuse High. I was the editor of the yearbook, even though I had no experience. I did choir and the musical, and more AP classes. Took an online Spanish Course (?). I realized that the best thing I could do with my life is write and edit. I learned how to kiss.

18-Senior. This year was fun. I got to know all the teachers, got away with tons of stuff, ruled SHS as the first graduating class. We didn't have seniors the year before, so it was exciting to be the top dogs. Twice. Kept singing in madrigals. Did an internship with the Standard Examiner and still did yearbook. Really got obsessed with grammar. Concluded I was born to do something with the language arts. Ended a relationship with a guy I'd dated for a while. He was cool, but it was over.

19- Freshman. At the bottom of the totem pole at the University of Utah studying Linguistics instead of English as planned. Dated a really cute guy for a while, got dumped, and survived relatively happy. Met people from all over the world.

I can't wait to see what else is in store for me.

-ME

Semester 2, sans Choir

Two days of my second semester of college: complete. They were pretty painless and easy going, I’m really grateful.

But something is missing—and it’s a big deal. I’m not in choir.

This is not my choice; in fact, I would do anything to have it. Well, I guess not anything. My major just conflicts with music. Music isn’t my top priority, but it’s up there. It keeps me alive.
My Linguistics 3510 class conflicts with not only Women’s Chorus, but with A Capella as well, which is the choir a level higher, but still something I could handle. I can’t do either one. I can’t do Institute Singers either, because they meet at the same time.

I can’t even be in my Ward Choir, because that meets the same time as mission preparation, and as part of my calling I have to go.

Ever since about 5th grade, I’ve been in some type of choir. There was a break in 7th grade, but I was taking voice lessons at that point so I was still singing.

I love writing, but the process of it is quite solitary. It is the path I have chosen, but there is no choir of writers to shelter me or welcome me into their loving arms. There is no bond, no family of people united in a common love. There is no one to make me lift me and assure me I am needed. Writers don’t do that. We wander alone with our notepads, trying to make life an understandable fantasy. We explain things, we make up stories, and we imagine things and record them. It is a beautiful art because it is one of communication. But we are not together. We need one another only so one can read another’s work.

I will miss choir, but I intend to do it again. I’ll be surviving without singing, or playing piano.

Side note: I promise I’ll stop complaining, but this is weird. I have two classes that seem almost identical in my head and it makes me confused! Linguistics 3510 and Writing 2010. We even use the same textbook! This makes me even more enraged because I don’t need the linguistics class if my writing class is teaching me the same things…
Anyway, I love school and I love college. I was really meant to be here, and I realize that even more now that I’m here.

With love,

-M

PS- Like the new backdrop of the blog? I hope so!

PPS- I watched "Doubt" recently. Amazing show, the intensity and power makes me shiver with delight. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Grammar Grievances

I’m not sure when my obsession began, but it must have caught fire over the summer. I started listening to a pod cast about grammar and I became nothing more than simply intrigued. When I came back from summer break, my head began to spin as suddenly I realized I was talking to my friends who couldn’t construct a grammatically sound sentence. Worse, they were oblivious to their errors. For example, after the first choir concert:

“You did amazing, August!”

I smile and say, “Thank you very much,” and try not to scream. How can I think about my compliment without ignoring the blatant grammatical errors screeching louder than an air horn during an AP test? I performed amazingly, not amazing. Amazing is an adjective; it describes a noun. Yes, the performance was amazing, but the performers did amazingly. Amazingly is an adverb, so it describes an action. Didn’t we all learn this in elementary school?

Then there is a lovely gift, accompanied by an earnest, but annoying statement: “I got something for you,”

I wince and say, “You do?” What can she mean, she got me something? How does that work? She must mean she has something for me… that must be it. But why can’t she just say so?

Telephone conversations are frustrating as well. “Where are you at?”

It may be a grammar myth that ending a sentence with a preposition is wrong, but why in the world would he purposely do it? It just sounds so wrong, and to most traditional grammarians it would be. If a sentence like that worms its way into his college entrance essay it will be hook, line, and sinker. True, he probably doesn’t know how ignorant he sounds, but I can’t focus on explaining to him where I am when he talks like that, and it is only harming him in the long run.

I must say, girls are worse than boys, probably because they talk more. “You know Chris; he’s the boy that took me to Prom…”

Yes, I know Chris, but I didn’t know that he we was an object! Shouldn’t it be something like, “You know Chris; he’s the boy who took me to Prom…” That is for objects, and I don’t care if we’re only gossiping on the phone, Chris is a person, not a mop.

Not even in the retail world am I safe from the horrors of the sagging standards of the English language. For instance, at the grocery store, the sign above the speedy checkout line reads: “Ten items or less,”

Less is for a noun that can’t really be counted, like water, for example. But the last time I checked, you can easily count if you have ten items or fewer. I know I can tell when the person in front of me in the speedy checkout line has twelve cans of soup, but once again, that was something we learned in elementary school, so you never know.

The most horrific grammar incident can happen only in writing, but nevertheless I loathe it: “Buy one; get one half off!!!!”

Would you ever use more than one period at the end of a sentence to reiterate that the sentence was over? No, of course not! Then why do advertisers, as well as overzealous texting teens, use multiple exclamation points to stress that the sentence has not only ended, but that it was exclaimed from rooftops? Maybe I’m just a stingy Puritan caught in a time warp, but one punctuation mark is enough.

I’m not a good listener all the time; I’ll be the first to admit. When the grammar is poor, I can’t focus on the meaning, only the mistakes. What was once the subject of an interesting online radio program is now the obsession of my short editing career, not to mention the constant distraction from civilized teenage conversation. I may seem pessimistic now, but just wait until I copy edit your term paper…